To all of you who have ever been the object of my derision for sporting a fanny pack, I must now offer my sincerest apologies. Please pardon my bondage to style and failure to embrace functionality. While in the hospital, I was put on some additional medication for nausea that is delivered via a continuous pump infusion. I was assured that it would be like an insulin pump. Have you seen the latest insulin pumps? They're like pagers and getting smaller all the time. This pump - more like a Gameboy. He needs a place to ride. Unfortunately, that place is in the eggplant colored fanny pack made just for him. Since I don't really have a fanny, wearing it around the waist is not an option. So, resting on my shoulder as I travel around is my brand new anti-nausea fanny pack turned man-bag. It's not cute. At this point, though, you could color it pink and label it Nancy's, and I would sport it just the same as long as it keeps the nausea at bay.
As Doug shared with you, those days before the hospital were very, very rough. I would have written sooner, but have not had the mental or physical energy to do so. Hospitalization for a few days with a switch to continuous pump feedings seemed the best answer to get my nausea controlled and my calories back up, and it has helped tremendously on both counts. Today around 4, I will start my first feed here at home. We are trusting that it will go very well.
I will keep this entry short as I still tire very easily, but I do want to make mention of one thing. If I'm repeating myself, please forgive me. Many of you are asking and have asked if there is anything you can do other than pray. We've all heard ourselves say at one time or another, "Well, I guess all I can do is pray." I can't tell you how many times I've uttered those words over the years not truly realizing their gravity. At this point, prayer really is all that most of you can do, but it just so happens that it is also the MOST IMPORTANT thing you can do. We all have this need to get our hands dirty. It makes us feel like we have done more if we are needed for something hands-on. I'm sure many of you would line up to take me to my radiation appointments, and I am so grateful knowing I have that kind of network! Of course, I am also grateful that I have a family who is willing, able, and desires to fill those roles. Even though I have an amazing support system, this road is treacherous - it is dark, it has many detours, there are traffic jams, and there are enormous pot-holes. I need your prayers! Oh, how desperately I need them. So, when you think, "What can I do for my friend, Daniel?" Please, get on your knees for me. I need that more than anything, and I can assure you, I need it everyday.
1. complete healing and increased comfort in the meantime
2. His strength
3. His glorification
4. patience - waiting is so hard
5. for many without a personal relationship with Jesus to begin to understand what that means and experience it for themselves as a result of my struggle
Thank you for being with me on this excruciating journey. Thank you for coming alongside me.
Thank God for being with all of us.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11