I know my posts are scarce lately. I apologize for that. The last couple of weeks have been emotional and tiring. I haven't found myself in a mindset conducive to writing very often. I needed to write a short message to you today, though.
First, you must share in the joy that I have only 2 treatments remaining! That's right! On Thursday of this very week, I will receive my last radiation treatment God-willing. Do you have any idea how it feels to go from 33 treatments remaining to 2 treatments remaining?! It feels like such a tremendous blessing from the Father of light, hope, love, and peace. I know that you have prayed to Him on my behalf so many times for help making it through these treatments, and I firmly believe that your prayers have been answered. As difficult as the treatment has been, I cannot accept anything other than mine has been less difficult than it would have been without your petitions to the Father on my behalf. I know this to be true, and I am so grateful.
Doug may have shared this with you in an email, but I must also tell you that I was able to go to church this weekend for the first time in so long. What a sweet time of worship I had! I praise Him for those sweet moments. Oh, if everyone could understand and believe just how real and wonderful He is.
I do have a special request as I transition into the next phase. After treatment ends this week, I will enter into a waiting period of sorts. I will be waiting for side effects to decrease and for my appointment with the surgeon to see if he thinks any surgery is still warranted. I won't have an appointment with him until the end of August. That will be a preliminary examination. Then, about 3 weeks later, I expect to have a CT and more definitive plans to be made. I ask you to pray for my faith to have strong legs. I want to trust Him more than I ever have in my life. That is what this requires and that is what He deserves. I have gone back and forth on what to ask for specifically where surgery is concerned. Certainly, I ask you to pray that none is required for my tongue. At first, my medical common sense wouldn't allow me to ask that none would be required on my neck either (a couple of lymph nodes remain very swollen), but I am trying to remember that if He can create this world, he can shrink my neck even after the treatment has ended. He is the Great Physician, and we must not forget that no matter how much knowledge he entrusts to us. Pray that surgery won't be necessary, but that His will be done and accepted with steadfast faith - not my own.
One more thing I need to tell you today. In typing a response to a message from a friend earlier, I was reminded of something that I have said so many times throughout my life. He has never failed me. He has never failed me. He has never failed me! Truly, He hasn't! He won't now.
He won't fail you either.
Two more prayer requests: Don't forget to pray for Mr. Carroll as he deals with oral cancer of his own. Again, it is in his bone, so it much more involved. He must have all his teeth removed before starting chemo and radiation. You can imagine the prayers for strength that he needs.
Pray for my caregivers at Vanderbilt. Pray that I would be bold in sharing my faith with them during these last few days of treatment.
Verses sent to me by a dear Aunt in a card:
Because he loves me, says the Lord, I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation. -Psalm 91:14-16